I Hate You, I Love You
by Unoriginality
Summary: Fuukuro, Yaoi implications, 'r'ish sex, and incredibly short and...interesting


**_I Hate You, I Love You_**  
_By: Unoriginality_

She hated him. Hate, hate, hate. His lips met hers before he tossed back his head, flinging sweat from his brunette locks. Oh, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate. His hips thrust rhythmically into hers, pressing the bed into the wall with a thump. Hate, hate, hate. From the sounds of htings as she had walked down the hall to his dorm, they were not the only ones claiming the night for more enjoyable activities. Hated him, hated him, hated him...but what if she didn't?

Her eyes flew open, fear settling in heavily over her, suffocating her. 

Squall's lips met hers one last time before he withdrew and lay beside her, making the narrow dorm bed- lumpy from their nightly excursions this last month- a bit more cramped. A few minutes later, she could hear rhythmic breathing, indicating that he'd fallen asleep, sated in the wake of their lovemaking. She simply continued to stare at the plain seiling above her.

Hate, hate, hate, HATE. He was Seifer's sworn enemy, that was why she hated him.

That was also why she was there.

Drowning himself in any poor girl's depth if she would spread her legs, Seifer had been an unbearable asshole. Fujin, of course, was concerned, knowing he was only trying to escape the memories of Ultimecia, but he'd simply laughed her off, calling her an overconcerned mother hen, brooding over someone who could take care of himself and didn't need her.

Fine, see if he laughs THIS off.

Had it been anyone else she'd gone to, Seifer wouldn't have cared. Wouldn't have batted an eyelash. But Squall Leonhart...

The poor bastard had been hurt too. Hurt by the one he loved. She was a shallow flake, for Hyne's sake. Probably already found a new squeeze to buy her pretty, shiney, round things.

So she went to him. He'd be vulnerable, and perfect for catching Seifer's attention.

She'd gone to his dorm, asking to talk. What was Seifer like when they'd been together?

He'd seemed uncomfortable at first, refusing to talk about his time with the man, but eventually he confessed that Seifer'd always been this way, and why do you ask? She flitted about the question before answering that she didn't remember quite such a jerk-off. He shrugged it off, saying she would have had to have been on his shit list before. Now he was just bitter.

Their conversation would slowly turn to other subjects, what their excuses were for being the way they were, who the stupidest people in the world were (she'd said Raijin, Squall beat her with Zell), and things like it, leaving her in his room until nearly midnight.

She finally asked what had happened with Rinoa. Hadn't he loved her?

He looked away, muttering that he didn't want to talk about it. Sensing an opportunity, she promptly suggested that they didn't have to talk, and that it was okay if he didn't love her, maybe they both just needed some comfort?

She dind't get back to her hotel room with Raijin and Seifer until the next morning.

Maybe one night hadn't been enough comfort, so she'd visited him again, and again, and again. She would visit him until eventually Seifer found out. She didn't care how long that would take.

She glanced over at her bedmate, watching him sleep. Deep even breaths, curled up against her still-warm body. His eyelashes rested lightly against his cheeks, his hair fallen carelessly across his face. He looked so innocent and serene, laying there, almost like a little boy.

Hatehatehatehate....nononono!

She'd always hated the cold-hearted, uncaring bastard, mostly because Seifer did. But he'd been so good to her, giving without asking for anything in return, being a shoulder to cry on (or perhaps just complain bitterly to) when she needed it, perhaps even loving her when he knew damn well she didn't love him.

The more she knew him, the more she found just a hurt little boy, avoiding pain of heartbreak the only way he knew how: shutting himself away from as many people as possible.

Just like her.

She focused back on the ceiling. Hatehatehatehate... a glance back at him reconfirmed her doubts. She didn't hate him, after what she'd found out about him, she couldn't. He was just what she'd always fancied Seifer to be. Squall just hid it to avoid pain.

After a moment, she turned to him, snuggling against his chest.

"Mmm, Fujin," he quietly breathed, only half-concious of her action.

Let Seifer find out. He undoubtedly already had, it was no secret, and he obviously didn't care. So neither did she. She wasn't going to try to hate someone she didn't anymore for that man.

She gave Squall a light kiss, hoping he wouldn't wake up.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I'm not going to use you any more, I promise." He held her a bit tighter, almost as if he'd heard, then lay still.

She shifted to a more comfortable position, and fell asleep to the sound of his beating heart, beating in time with ehrs, beating a mutual, silent message, "I love you...I love you...I love you."


End file.
